Things not to put on your dating headline
Folks, these are ALL real. I saw so many lame, dirt-bag, pathetic or otherwise that I decided these needed to be brought to light. I’ve seen some remarkably douche-y comments in my time so I decided it’s time to put the basic item of a headline/one-line intro on display for all to see what I’ve seen.
“Is there a return policy for false advertisement?” – We get it, people have lied to you….you’re not the first nor the last, try something new!
“90% of the time people won’t respond 100% of the time” – See above.
“Hi”, “Hey”, “Hello” or any variation thereof – not an intro, people. I know you can be a tiny bit more creative than that.
“Come one come all!” – Well at least you can’t say it’s a girl’s fault for expecting you to be faithful…
“I read somewhere that periods attract bears” – Seriously, what are you hoping to accomplish with this one?
Username: Thisismynightmare says “You have a perfect face for radio.” Hey ladies, this screams verbally abusive.
“Do somthin” – Can I correct your spelling? BTW, can we just put all commands on the ‘do not use’ template?
“Willing to lie and say we met at ___” – Listen, starting a relationship off with a lie is NOT a good thing, despite what you may have been told.
“No drama please” – What this actually tells me is that you bring the drama.
“My dogs are better than you.” – You created an entire profile with pictures, personal info and all just to insult every single person who might possibly interested in you? If you’re this bored, get a hobby that doesn’t involve other people.
“Meeting retards just got easier.” See above.
“Ladies only” – Is this really that necessary or are you just telling me you’re homophobic?
“Personal philosophy – clothing optional” – Congratulations on perpetuating the sexualization of women!
“Only if you can make me grin” – This makes you sound like you’re selfish. A relationship is give and take not all about you.
“Have a little depth” – This would be great if it weren’t coming from the guy with a gym selfie as his photo…let’s do our best to avoid hypocrisy, shall we?
All in all, these do help us determine which of you we should keep at a 10-foot pole distance so for that, we thank you. Insert shameless plug for a nice cause-focused dating app I’ve used: Neqtr.
Jen E. Nunez 